feeling the pride

 we've come a long way from the few thousand who marched in 1978, against anita bryant and her anti-gay "save the children" campaign --- now it's just a great celebration of a very diverse queer culture

#07

i have neglected to post this baby, which started blooming a week ago --- the blossom stem got a little twisted coming out, but the blossoms are huge

columbus!

dog and robert and i drove down to columbus today --- first time i had seen the place in fifteen years --- the "restored" falls of the chattahoochee were excellent --- and downtown columbus sorta blew me away --- they've come a long way in repairing the wreckage of the last century

ad astra

iris' birthday was the 22nd and cousin carol's three days later, both people i miss more than any other who have left the scene to date --- bob and i weren't terribly close, mainly because i found him a little fearsome when i first met him in athens, probably in 1972, but we had a lot of friends in common and i soon found out what an excellent person he was --- it was always good to run into him on the belt line or in the botanical garden or wherever --- he died yesterday, and his passing congealed the melancholy of the last few days ---

so i spent a couple of hours this morning walking and thinking about dead friends

  

don't push the river . . .

for the first time in too long, dog and i got out to the river --- 

fall flowers

the fenestraria on the balcony has started a little early this year --- unless i kill it, it should blossom through the winter

in addition to the cattleya, the chocolate oncidium is showing off with two sprays and the alien oncidium is about to open

and what we called "big urnge," due to the size of its blooming, has now produced a very large and thick stalk--- it will be interesting to see how well it reblooms

the fate of the republic hangs in the balance

last night, watching the "debate" between hillz and dumbfuk, i felt like the audience watching "springtime for hitler" in the producers --- jesus christ, what a mess! "surreal" best describes the spectacle --- i have to believe that this country could never elect that buffoon after last night

but hillary demonstrated that, as h.l. mencken once noted, “one horse-laugh is worth ten-thousand syllogisms.”

the orchidean alliance

this little beauty was given to me last year when it was not in bloom --- glad i kept it!

and the second half of the jon buono cattleya, which i divided last september and nearly killed, has bloomed, a couple of weeks after the first one did

i am frightened --- more are starting to hatch, i'm sure of it

life form redux

moving around

this is a chart from a compendium to the eighth federal census, 1860, depicting the change in states' ranking relative to population 1790-1860 --- purty cool

a life form

i wish i knew exactly when i bought this tomato but it's been over a week, maybe two --- this development is disturbing

rainy day!

it's been a long time since we've had a rainy day, and it was delicious --- too bad for music midtown, which at one point was evacuated because of thunder storms\

which is not half as sad as whoever on their way to the park dropped their bag of blow on the 14th st sidewalk --- that must have harshed their buzz

waiting on fall

it's still too damn hot during the day, but yesterday evening there was a nice easterly breeze, which made for very pleasant conditions on the thirteenth floor

summer's wearing me down

it's been the hottest summer on record --- with an ungodly number of days with highs above 90 and lows that never dropped below the low 70s, usually with high humidity --- in terms of weather, it's been a shitty summer ---

three and a half hours at audc this evening, almost too much blather to bear --- i am probably kinda testy when i actually speak up, but it can't be helped i guess, since one of my personal failings is an inability to suffer fools gladly, as they say --- i told the ex. dir. tonight that i was counting on the december meeting being my last --- six years is enough

but the lantern parade kicked off art on the belt line, and i love it

and this

remembrance

You’re expecting some kind of obligatory 9-11 post, aren’t you?
Here it is, but you’re not gonna like it.
15 years ago today 19 shitheads attacked America.
They killed 3000 of us. And then … America got its revenge for 9-11.
Yes we did. Many times over. We killed them. We killed them all. We killed their families. We killed their wives and their kids and all their neighbors. We killed whole nations that weren’t even involved just to make goddamned sure. We bombed their cities into rubble. We burned down their countries.
They killed 3000 of us, we killed 300,000 of them or more.
8000 of us came home in body bags, but we got our revenge. Yes we did.
We’re still here. They aren’t.
We win. USA! USA! USA!
Right?
You goddamned right. We. Win.
Except…
Every year on this day we bath in the blood of that day yet again. We watch the towers fall over and over. It’s been 15 goddamned years, but we just can’t get enough. We’ve just got to watch it again and again.
It’s funny how we never show those videos of the bombs falling on Baghdad today. Or the dead in the streets of Afghanistan. We got our revenge, but we never talk about that today. No, we just sit and watch the towers fall yet again.
Somewhere out there on the bottom of the sea are the rotting remains of the evil son of bitch who masterminded the attack. It took a decade, but we hunted him down and put a bullet in his brain. Sure. We got him. Right? That’s what we wanted. that’s what our leaders promised us, 15 years ago today.
And today those howling the loudest for revenge shrug and say, well, yeah, that. That doesn’t matter, because, um, yeah, the guy in the White House, um, see, well, he’s not an American, he’s the enemy see? He’s not doing enough. So, whatever. What about that over there? And that? And…
Yeah.
15 years ago our leaders, left and right, stood on the steps of the Capitol and gave us their solemn promise to work together, to stand as one, for all Americans.
How’d that promise work out?
How much are their words worth? Today, 15 years later?
 It’s 15 years later and we’re STILL afraid. We’re still terrorized. Still wallowing in conspiracy theories and peering suspiciously out of our bunkers at our neighbors. Sure we won. Sure we did. We became a nation that tortures our enemies — and our own citizens for that matter. We’re a nation of warrantless wiretaps and rendition and we’ve gotten used to being strip searched in our own airports. And how is the world a better place for it all?
And now we’re talking about more war, more blood.
But, yeah, we won. Sure. You bet.
Frankly, I have had enough of 9-11. Fuck 9-11. I’m not going to watch the shows. I’m not going to any of the memorials. I’m not going to the 9-11 sales at Wal-Mart. I don’t want to hear about 9-11. I for damned sure am not interested in watching politicians of either party try to out 9-11 each other. I’m tired of this national 9-11 PTSD. I did my bit for revenge, I went to war, I’ll remember the dead in my own time in my own way.
I’m not going to shed a damned tear today.
We got our revenge. Many times over, for whatever good it did us.
I’m going to go to a picnic and enjoy my day. Enjoy this victory we’ve won.
I suggest you do the same.
  
Nathan Wellman is a Los Angeles-based journalist, author, and playwright