doglessness

i woke up to an excellent kitten, but no dog, so i squalled and squalled and squalled — everything i did and everywhere i looked, he wasn't there —  and so very still and quiet, too — walked three plus miles before breakfast, thinking only of him, and all that did was get me all sweaty — seeing the ashes just now, like seeing a coffin lowered into the earth, sorta finishes things up, i guess, although only sorta —

i forgot to clip a lock of hair, but maybe i can still find an appropriate furball around the house to save — otherwise i got a memory or two